Having an Autopilot Mode
OSDD/DID discussion is difficult, especially online. For the most part, people focus on alters and not the actual minutiae of dissociation. This post is...half an alter post and half a dissociation post.
I fairly recently realized that we split a sort of "autopilot" alter in some capacity a year ago. There have been days where it feels like there's a thick wall of glass between the "me" at that moment and the outside world. I chalked it up to regular depression and dissociation, but now we've realized there is a part whose sole function is to serve as a "conduit" with navigating the outside world.
I have seen this called a "shell alter" in very few circles and this is by word of mouth more common in OSDD, but this unfortunately overlaps with a similarly named abuse tactic seen in ritual abuse and mind control abuse. I am not personally a victim of RAMCOA, so I'm electing to leave that as a term exclusive to that community.
I prefer to call this a "conduit" alter because they fundamentally have no function in my internal world even though I perceive them as a separate entity. It has been strange to acknowledge their existence, especially since they're essentially a blank slate. I wonder if theyll be like this "forever" or if they'll eventually become more elaborate...
A lot of this feels very ridiculous to blog about but I felt like it'd be good to document this somewhere somehow. I don't think I see people talk about this much--not on public forums anyway.